He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize