You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
