I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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