I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
