then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize