It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Randomize
