South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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