dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
i think i just lost a toe
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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