Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
