My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i think i have herpe
just one?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Randomize
