maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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