dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
