I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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