Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
