Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
