so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
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