I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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