and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Randomize
