Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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