You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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