it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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