I'm lost and stupid without you.
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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