it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
