I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Randomize
