But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
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