Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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