Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Randomize
