i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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