Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Holy shit dude........stairs
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
