too bad you live with your parents still
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
