Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
