Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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