How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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