This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
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