I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
