Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
