My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
