whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
