chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
