How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
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