I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Randomize
