Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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