Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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