when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
