some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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