Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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