batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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