So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
