wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
