she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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